


Flu (a 221B)

by SweetLateJuliet



Series: Edgeways [5]
Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: 221B Ficlet, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-07
Updated: 2013-07-07
Packaged: 2017-12-18 00:21:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/873580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SweetLateJuliet/pseuds/SweetLateJuliet





	Flu (a 221B)

Let me tell you some things you might think would be true but are not.

You cannot breathe a word of this. Really. I was made to sign a confidentiality agreement. I’m pretty sure that was a joke but it’s hard to tell.

Goddammit. Let me get a cup of tea first and put on my kitten jumper. The appalling thing was a gag gift, but joke’s on Stamford and everybody else: I don’t have to look at it when I wear it. So it usually improves a strop. Also? Cosy.

So. Here are some things you might think would be true but are not.

_One._ The British Government does not get sick, either because this is conceptually impossible, or because it keeps current on its vaccinations.

_Two._ If the British Government did fall ill, it would rally the NHS’s brightest and best. It would not kidnap its brother’s boyfriend for a dead-of-night house call.

_Three._ If the British Government knew it would be receiving a caller, it would get dressed. It would not wear a manky Judas Priest t-shirt and briefs, then expect this _never to be mentioned again_.

_Four._ If the British Government had the flu, it would keep a stiff upper lip. It would not _whinge!_

_Goddammit._ God help you, Mycroft, if you’ve given your brother this bug.


End file.
